Abrielle Neff Foundation

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Weekend Events

This past weekend we attended a grief support meeting provided by CMH. This time the topic was Handling the Holidays, a topic that we need help with every year. We were able to catch up with friends we've made there before and meet some new ones experiencing their first holidays without their child. We were also able to take the girls for a session just for kids. They made memory boxes and did other play therapy while talking about their sibling.

After the support group meeting, I went to visit the Degase's at the hospital. I took Deryk things from the Foundation, including a lizard, a car, and a stuffed iguana. I think he enjoyed them. In visiting Deryk, I had to go to the PICU. The last time I was there was when we said goodbye to Abby. Wow, was that tough. I had my brave face on, but it really bothered me to be in that space again, just a few rooms down from where we were two and a half years ago.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

WINNER!

The winner of the Northwest t-shirt quilt was drawn on Saturday. The winner.... Mary Riggs from Maryville! In total, $1442.00 was raised for the two charities! WOW!

Monday, November 9, 2009

Have You Seen Them?!

They came in just before the parade and look GREAT! Here's a look in case you haven't seen being shown off in public yet ~

(hoodies also available in gray)

We ordered these for those of us walking in the parade to start and now there have been enough requests for the fleeces and hoodies that we are going to re-order. If you would like one, leave me a comment or email me your sizes and we will get yours ordered.

Friday, November 6, 2009

EFE Second Graders

Thursday I was presented a check from Eugene Field Elementary School's second graders for the Foundation. They raised $136.00 during their Pumpkin Market. The Pumpkin Market was an evening that parents were able to come and purchase their child's art work, poems, and baked goods for a $1.00 donation. The kids then had a voting day, complete with a voting booth and ballets, and the Foundation was selected as the recipient. There were also bankers for the class that had to count the money. What made this donation extra special is that some of these kids were in preschool with Abrielle! When I asked how many knew Abby from preschool, almost half the grade raised their hand.

Thank you second graders!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Holidays Have Begun

The "holiday season" is here and my mind knows it. Something about the changing leaves makes me begin my restless nights even more. I am not sure if it is in anticipation of all the upcoming events or if it is because retailers think it's time to start shoving Christmas at us. Either way, I know it's here and Saturday was just the start of it all. My mind fills with all kinds of "what ifs" and they are hard to shake. I must admit, there were tears at Mady's class party. How could there not be still. Two and a half years is not enough time for the tears to not flow freely at such things. I don't know how long it will take, because tears are still a part of my daily life.

I have been doing my best to not put too many of these "feelings" posts out here, but as the holidays get closer, that is harder for me to do. Just bear with me through a few as they do help me emotionally.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Witches and Spiders ...

Maryville Treatment Center does different things throughout the year to help support local charities. Well, they took a "vote" of money in jars and the Foundation won! So witches hats and fuzzy spiders lurked around the institution, costing the recipient $1.00 to send it on. The employees were given the chance to "black list" themselves to keep from getting the scary items for a $2.00 donation.

Then, MTC had a chili cook-off, during which they sold homemade cinnamon rolls to benefit the Foundation. At this event, there were also balloons available to break for a $2.00 donation for a chance to win a prize. All this amounted to $465.49 being raised and donated to the Foundation!

Thank you to everyone that participated at MTC!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Poker Tournament

I wanted to pass along some information about the poker tournament this weekend to benefit Deryk Degase.

Saturday, November 7th

Elks Lodge

7:00 pm

$20 poker tournament

Open to the public

Our Story...

Abrielle came into this world in a hurry to get started, which gave us our first glimpse at her personality. Not waiting on Dr Jane to put on gloves, only a towel to catch her with, she weighed in at six pounds fifteen ounces. From the beginning Abby had reflux, but there seemed to more than just that as she failed to gain weight. At four months we were sent to draw all kinds of labs, hoping for a solution, but all was normal. By six months of age, the vomiting became worse, almost nightly. We were keeping records of every calorie she ate, every dirty diaper, and every time she vomited. By this time Abby was refusing to eat supper most nights and would throw up her undigested lunch after bathtime at 8:00. Her food was just sitting in her tummy all day. Dr Watson sent us to Omaha Childrens Hospital to Dr Zapata a pediatric gastroenterologist to help diagnois the problem. There, over the next year and a half of her life, Abby underwent testing, treatments, and outpatient procedures. During every procedure she was given a stuffed animal to hold for comfort, even though she had Blankie with her.
To make a long story short, after the accident we discovered St Francis Hospital did not have a program like this for kids and Abby's Hugs was born.

That Tragic Day...

Thursday, March 29, 2007, began like any other school day in our household with the only exception being that it was Abby's sharing day at preschool. We had a rule that if the sharing item was not picked out the night before (which it usually wasn't), Abby had to be ready for school before she could find something to take. This morning was just like most ... nothing was picked out the night before. She hurried faster than usual that way she would have time to find something. After brushing her teeth, she ran to her room to find some clothes. I always tried to give Abby choices, but she was down to her last clean pair of capris. I gave her the option of wearing those, a pair of Gymboree Fruit Punch capris with a bright yellow shirt or jeans and a purple kitty shirt. She decided on the capri outfit which she had actually rejected every other day that week. After getting dressed, she went into Sissy's room and was playing with her LeapPad when I found her. I asked her how she wanted her hair fixed and she said "little pony". (Not that she was going to leave it in anyway) I helped her onto the sink and she dug through her basket of hair things until she found a yellow one. We went into the living room so I could sit down to brush her hair. Since sitting on my lap was now impossible, Abby stood in front of me as I pulled her hair up with the little yellow hair tie. She ran to her room and began looking for something to bring for sharing. She came out with her Little People's Noah's Ark set stuffed full of extra toys. Being a mean Mommy, I said, You can only bring one toy. Aww, was the response as she took the ark back to her room to look for something else. I went on about my routine of making my lunch and everything else to be ready to leave for work. Mady and I headed out to the Expedition and Abby was not following behind. I went back inside to find her and Marc on their way from her room with her big "bobbycat" (bobcat skidloader) for sharing. They had been looking for the scoop that attaches to the front but ran out of time. They decided that just the bobbycat would work. Marc helped buckle Abby in her car seat. Because she was so small we still used the 5-point harness and not just the seatbelt so she required some help. As we left the house, Marc pulled out ahead of the girls and I onto the gravel road. Just around the first set of curves past our house, I slowed down so we could watch the turkeys fly across the road. I am not sure if Abby saw them or not, but she said she did. We continued on, oblivious to our fate that lie ahead.

last added to 10/29 ...this I will add to as I am able ...thanks for understanding.

The Sentence

On June 25, 2008, Ryan C Sundermann was sentenced to 6 years in the Missouri Department of Corrections on charges of involuntary manslaughter. Sundermann wrecklessly caused the death of Abrielle Neff in a motor vehicle collision on March 29, 2007. Sundermann was charged with failing to maintain proper control of his vehicle, failure to drive on the right half of the roadway and operated a motor vehicle after consuming alcohol.
Sundermann was previously convicted of Driving While Intoxicated and Failure to Drive on the Right Half of the Roadway on April 25, 2006 and sentenced to 2 years probation, 12 days in jail, and a $300 fine. On December 19, 2006, Sundermann was again convicted of Excessive Blood Alcohol Content-Prior Offender which he received a Suspended Execution of Sentence of 180 days, was continued on 2 years probation and received a fine.